Quick Read: Should I Really..?

Question by Rock-Paper-Scissor-Shoot!: Quick Read: Should I Really..?
Should I really continue on this seriously? Normally when I’m out of inspiration I write other “just for fun” stories, but when I started this I began having a lot of fun with it:

She was nice. There was the thick smell of pot on her and she squinted even when she wasn’t smiling, which was rare. And there wasn’t a moment that there wasn’t something alcoholic in her hand. None of that makes her a bad person though, because she was nice and called him Wayne…

People shouldn’t smoke, it’s awful and Wayne wishes he knew that five seconds ago when he wasn’t hacking up a lung—and he always thought that was just a stupid exaggeration. His throat went dry the moment the smoke scrapped down his air tube, digging a hole in his chest that stings and burns, embedded with embers that crackle there on fire. If Wayne didn’t know regret then, he believes he understands it now.

The nice woman, Lidia cackles behind him. “First cigarette Wayne?”

Her cold, clammy fingers slide up Wayne’s shoulder, letting her palm sit there. As she patted him, the smile radiating from the air, he glances over. Lidia is much more mature person than he is, her body fully developed and revealing itself from under a useless cotton blanket. She has a cigarette of her own.

Those pink, thin lips latched onto the filter and breathed through it like a daily routine, blowing out the tobacco version of carbon dioxide.

Wayne guesses his face must have looked odd, because she laughed more upon seeing it, chocking on it. This made him chuckled, “First laugh Lidia?”

Sneering wickedly she spoke, “Cute… for a guy who’s never had a cigarette or played yahtzee, you sure were in an odd place last night.”

Yahtzee… that’s the code word—Wayne believes—for sex. Though it could just be a joke between the two. It’s just, once Wayne takes a look back on movies where people, well doing it, they’re gasping and shouting… it all reminds him of board games, we gasp and shoat. When he told Lidia that, she laughed and admitted once she screamed out “YAHTZEE!”

Clearing his throat, Wayne shrugged, putting the cough maker on the night stand’s ash tray. As he explains, he’s really explaining it to himself being he barely remembers it. “Yesterday wasn’t special. It was just Thursday. A day people usually mistake for Friday, but I knew it was Thursday. Another day I had to live through, one in which I’d spend breathing, blinking, and moving…” He lays back upon the wall and then turn to her, raising one side of his mouth, eager to tell her with her own mischievous look staring back at him“I also knew I would see all that’s normal to me but would be gloomy to the average person.”


“Yes… when awoke there was no one in the house and the lights seemed to be flickering on off, being its around the time when the maid changes all the lights at once… it felt like I was in a haunted, abandoned house… no, not haunted, just abandoned and at any moment the floor was going to cave in and my whole world would come tumbling down with me. So I went to school in fear of that… on my way this boy, Duncan in his cheap car pretended to try to run me over, bumping me in the leg over and over until I climbed onto it and asked,” He shrugged, “since I was there, for a ride… he didn’t like that so he pushed on the accelerator and I rolled off. When I gazed up I saw a little kitten. Duncan had run her over, pretending to try to kill me. To teach him a lesson I put the little cat in his locker.”

“That’s horrible. Are you a psychopath?” She asked him, but not at all taking him seriously, though he certainly is.

“No… just honest when recounting my life.”

“Sure, okay,” She said, probably thinking he is crazy and breathed in more of the cigarette, before she spun her hand around, motioning Wayne “Now come on, get to the part about how you came to the bar.” He watched the smoke leave her between her words and pass her teeth. It looked neat.

But he goes on anyways, “Later, in the evening I was sitting on the kitchen counter eating a mixture of different pastas with Alfredo sauce as I tried to dodge calls from my friend P.J, she was ticked off because she automatically assume I was the one who put the cat in Duncan’s locker, which was true but she doesn’t have to think I’m such a horrible person so quickly-”

“Skip the delusional babble please.”

“I’ll try… Well when I put an Alfredo shell in my mouth, all the lights turned off. At ounce.

Best answer:

Answer by Zoey Redbird ©
Keep going, I like it :P

Add your own answer in the comments!

2 Responses to “Quick Read: Should I Really..?”

  1. Frieda Zimmerman says:

    Keep going, but watch the tenses there. You keep switching between past and present tense, and it’s confusing and distracting.

  2. Ramin S says:

    Hey I watched it yesterday! It is an awesome movie. You can watch it for free here:


    No stupid surveys :) )

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